It's the Little Things

Today I received my new debit card in the mail. It expires in 2021, by which time Trump will no longer be president. I mean, I suppose he could be re-elected for a second term, but I sincerely hope that the pendulum will swing back a bit faster this time. There is a light at the end of this tunnel and it's getting closer every day.

Today I encountered the word Coca-Colonialism. The concise description of a particular phenomenon delighted me. All those people who revere German for having such delightfully specific words are clearly not paying attention to English. Or language in general.

Today I successfully held Child's Pose. This doesn't seem like a lot. I think it's widely regarded as the easiest yoga pose, and it's certainly a resting pose. But in the past my stomach has always gotten in the way. I couldn't breath unless I widened my knees to provide a space. Today I didn't have to do that. I held it. I breathed. I felt a lovely stretch in my back and neck. Small victories are still victories and Downward Dog feels a bit less impossible now.

Yoga Wrap Up

I made it through the 30 days of yoga challenge. Sort of. It took me about 40 days to get through, because it turns out that I can't commit to 30 minutes of yoga every single day. Fridays are especially hard. If I go out after work, I won't be home for long enough to squeeze in the 30 minutes. But I kept chugging along and eventually made it to the end of the series.

Then I put on the video for the 30th day and it was introduced as a freestyle, do what you want treat for the final day. And that's the opposite of what I want. I started watching the videos so that someone else would tell me what to do. I need that structure. I'm awful at coming up with my own routine. Even if I know all the pieces. I just can't put it together into something reasonable, and I always stop after about half a workout.

After that, I just lost momentum. I tried another video, but I'd taken off for long enough that I was back to all the old aches and pains from my first forays into yoga. It was frustrating. Especially since some of the poses had started to come easier. And the cure is obviously to keep doing it every day. Or 5 days a week at least, which I can manage easily. But once you stop it's so hard to get started again. Especially when your husband just wants to watch TV and work on the puzzle and you know you ought to treasure the time together since he's leaving soon.

But he is leaving soon. Monday, in fact. At which point I'm bound and determined to get back into a routine. And stick with it this time. Even after he comes home. I will figure out how to make this work. And I will touch my toes before the year is out.

Yoga Check In

I'm about halfway through the 30-day yoga challenge, and it this point it's looking like I will make it all the way through. I'm planning to start over again once I finish. Or maybe start doing some other yoga videos? Mostly I just want to keep this up. I like the way I'm feeling. I like that I can see myself improving, almost day to day. And I like the control I'm gaining over my body.

I still struggle with some of the poses. But others come much easier, which helps me stay motivated. And even the ones that I'm having trouble with, I'm already noticing improvements on. The nice thing about starting over from the beginning is getting to go back through and realize that I'm already stronger and more flexible than I was a month ago. I may still have trouble touching my toes, and I may continue to fall over, but I'm holding poses longer and sinking into them deeper.

It's also leaking out into my life a little bit, too. I know it's easy to roll your eyes at people who really embrace yoga as a lifestyle, I know I have in the past, but I'm starting to see how it can happen. When I find myself stressed about something at work, I can now slip pretty easily into a couple of deep breaths or a moment of grounding myself and get back on track much quicker. I don't know how far I'll really go with this, but for now it's working great.

Recommiting to Yoga

Predictably, I did not make it through the entire thirty days of yago. Though I actually did pretty well, all things considered. I made it fourteen days into the challenge, and the only day I missed was one on which I was not home long enough to do yoga. 

But then Thanksgiving happened. I was being too optimistic in thinking that I'd find a time and place to do yoga while surrounded by family and wine. Oh well. After I got home, I was planning to jump back in. But a few 12-hour work days got in the way of that. I was too exhausted to even think about yoga. Then again, part of the exhaustion was from my stress-fueled insomnia. I was maybe sleeping 6 hours a night, and I'm sure that if I'd managed to do some yoga, I'd have been relaxed enough to actually fall asleep. It's a vicious cycle.

So now I'm back to it. I decided to start back at the beginning of the 30 day cycle i was watching, rather than pick back up with day 15. This way it'll be a little easier to track that progress this time around.

I also like that I can already tell that a few things are coming easier. I still struggle mightily with downward dog. I think my biggest problem is that I have no idea how to modify it so that I can improve. But I've noticed improvments in other areas. I can touch my toes occasionally. I can hold lunges a little longer. It's heartening to see these little improvements. And with no travel in the foreseeable future, I ought to be able to make it through all 30 days.

30 Days of Yoga

I'm now three days in to a 30-day yoga challenge that I sort of fell into accidentally.

Since I quit going to the gym and paying for a personal trainer, I've been intending to work out more at home. This worked great for a little while. I was riding my bike to work and going for long rides on the weekends. But then summer happened and my desire to go outside went away. I lifted weights in our basement a few times, but nothing ever really stuck. It's too easy to have a beer with dinner or spend the night watching TV or reading instead.

With the house to myself, I decided to start looking into exercise videos available online. The thing I liked most about my personal trainer was that I had someone telling me what to do. I'm not great at putting together workouts for myself. It's too easy to decide halfway through to skip that extra set or just blow off legs completely. But with a video, there's a fixed time and routine, and it's easier to have someone doing it along with you.

There used to be a ton on Netflix, but they seem to have all been removed as part of Netflix's changing business model. So I ended up on YouTube looking at yoga videos. I found a series called Yoga with Adriene that had a promising looking challenge. It's aimed at beginners, and she offers tons of modifications and encouragement. The routines are all different and range in length from 10 to 30 minutes.

This isn't about getting into super shape right away. It's about baby steps. Establishing a routine. I want to get in the habit of doing ~30 minutes of yoga every day, and this seems like a good way to do that.

I've had a contentious relationship with yoga in the past. I think it's mostly the group classes, where everyone seems leagues ahead of me. As soon as I fail a pose, I get embarrassed and half the time that leads to me leaving early. Then I don't go back. And it's just a stupid cycle. But in the privacy of my own home, that embarrassment is gone. I can wobble and fall and get right back up and try again without getting strange looks from anyone.

It would be nice to have a mirror to check my body, but the truth is that my ballet training is kicking in pretty nicely. I can tell pretty easily when my hips are square, when my legs are too far apart, when I'm not standing up straight, when my weight isn't properly distributed. I'm still unsure about some poses, but I think that has more to do with my lack of flexibility. I'd really like someone to help me figure out Downward Dog, especially since it's such a popular pose. I'm not at all convinced I'm doing it right.

Still, I'm doing better with these videos than I expected to. I don't quite have the core strength needed for standing on one leg for an extended period of time or the flexibility necessary to actually flow into and out of lunges. But I'll get there. In the meantime the exercise has been a nice mix of relaxing and strenuous. Which is to say that I'm always nicely relaxed while I'm doing it and pleasantly sore the next day.

At this point I'm thinking that when I finish the 30 days, I may just go back to the beginning and start over. Hopefully I'll do better on some of the earlier exercises. For now I'm just taking baby steps towards strength and flexibility. Not that I have high hopes. If ten years of ballet didn't give me the ability to touch my toes, I doubt yoga will. At least I know I'll get stronger.

Motivating Myself...Again

It's amazing how quickly reasons become excuses. The weather got hot enough that I stopped riding my bike to work as often. Then Kevin was out of town for a few days. We were bust on the weekends. Before I knew it, I was barely getting in one bike ride a week, and I wasn't exercising at all outside of that.

I knew this was going to happen. There always comes a point in summer when the last thing I want to do is go outside. So biking to work as my only form of exercise wasn't going to be sustainable for long. This is why I started building up a home gym back in January. I have everything I need to work out down in the basement. The trick now is to actually do it consistently.

My plan is to start getting on the exercise bike for a half hour in the mornings again. That worked well last winter once I made it a habit, and I think I can do it again. Then I'll lift a few evenings a week and still go on long bike rides when I can on weekends.

The real trick here is going to be the evening work out. Somehow this wasn't really a problem when I was going to the gym, but I'm usually starving when I get home from work. The last thing I want to do is delay dinner 45 more minutes than I need to. Which is where snacks come in. I'm really not much of a snacker, but I bought some yogurts to have when I get home. Hopefully that will be enough to tide me over for a little while.

This should all work. I just need to stick with it. Wish me luck and motivation.

Keeping Up WIth Kevin

One of my more nebulous fitness goals has been a vague desire to keep up with Kevin. To be clear, this will probably never happen. Kevin has always had more strength and more stamina than me, and I doubt I'll ever actually catch up to him, fitness-wise. It's more that I want to be able to feel like I'm not slowing him down too much.

I've been getting better at this recently. We've gone on some longer bike rides together, and while I know he would go faster if I weren't with him, I don't make such a bad showing. At least I don't have to completely stop or forgo certain activities anymore. And if I average 11 mph on a bike ride that Kevin averages 13 mph on when he does it by himself, well 11 mph isn't exactly anything to be ashamed of.

This past weekend I did a pretty good job of matching Kevin. Certainly better than I would have done a year or two ago. Jen and Steve proposed a hike in Rock Creek Park, and Kevin almost immediately decided to bike down to meet them. I didn't want to drive in the city by myself, so I considered metroing down to meet them, but I ultimately decided that I could handle the bike ride and hike in the same day. And if I couldn't bike back, well the metro was always an option.

So on Saturday morning we woke up and biked the 18 miles to Steve's house. We went a bit out of our way so Kevin could show me the beginning of the C&O trail, which we may do part of at some point. It's packed dirt, not gravel, so we'd have to pick a day when it hasn't rained recently, but at least it wouldn't be as bumpy as the Accotink trail.

Jen made delicious bacon and pancakes for us when we arrived, and we hung out for a bit. Then we drove over to Rock Creek Park to find a trail. We decided on the Boulder Bridge trail, a 3.5 mile loop from nature center to creek and back. I fell a bit behind on the steeper uphill section, but it wasn't too bad. And we stopped partway through to drink some wine and play and excellent game called Infinite City (Kevin lost!).

After the hike I wasn't feeling up to biking all the way home, but neither was Kevin, so I felt better. We took a quick ride to Foggy Bottom, so we wouldn't have to haul our bikes through Metro Center, and took the train home. Granted, at the end of this I collapsed on the couch and Kevin went to umpire a baseball game, proving that I'm not actually as fit as he is. But I still feel pretty good about myself.

Arlington Loop

On Sunday I decided I wanted to bike the Arlington Loop. Kevin had talked about it before, and I always see the map on my way to work. It seemed like a fun ride. And while I knew it was longer than anything I'd done before, I was sure I was ready.

It turns out that 30 miles is significantly longer than 20 miles. Especially when it ends up being closer to 33 miles. But I did do it. I slowed down towards the end, and I had a hard time moving for the rest of the day. But I biked the entire loop.

The Arlington Loop itself is about 17 miles around the town of Arlington. It combines bits of the Custis Trail, the Mt Vernon Trail, Four Mile Run, and the end of the W&OD. I actually do about a mile of it on my commute to work, which is part of why I was interested in it. Of course that also means that the loop itself is about a 9 mile ride from my house. And, like every bike trail near our home, it's all downhill on the way out and all uphill on the way back.

I'm really glad I did it, though. The Custis Trail has a lot of ups and downs, but we did that on the front half so I had plenty of energy. It was like a roller coaster, and I built of some good speed on the downhill sections. Then there's a nice long stretch along the Potomac River. This part was a little crowded and a little close to the road, but biking by the river was still fun. And as we came around Gravelly Point, a plane came in for a landing right above us. It was really cool.

The ride home was rough, especially as we passed the 20 mile mark and still had most of the uphill section left. But once we got to the part of the trail I use for my commute things got a little easier. Mostly because I know that trail well enough to be able to mentally break it down into smaller sections. I know how long the flatter sections last, how much further to the big hill. And I ultimately made it home.


I was exhausted after the ride, and spent the afternoon sitting on the couch instead of the chores and errands I had planned. But I'm glad I did it. If nothing else, now I know I can do it. I'm getting stronger and faster (I actually did the section between home and work faster than ever, though work to home took significantly longer). It's great to know that I can survive such a long ride, and that even when I get tired I can keep going. I definitely have more endurance than I ever have before.

Accotink Trail

One of Kevin's favorite local bike trails is the Accotink trail. There's a 4 mile loop around Lake Accotink, which is about 8 miles south of our house. The ride ends up being about 20 miles total. Kevin was waiting patiently to take me on this ride, and on Saturday I decided I was ready.

I ended up not being quite as ready as I had though. Kevin warned me that the trail is more packed dirt and gravel than asphalt. I looked up my bike's specs to make sure it would be alright. There were several reviews on the site where I'd bought it from people successfully taking it on the Accotink trail, so I knew the bike at least would be fine. And there's a short gravel path near my house, so I assumed I knew what I was getting in to.

Unfortunately the trail was much bumpier than I was prepared for. There was a section of really old asphalt during that caused enough bouncing around for my boobs to hurt. It's probably not entirely fair to call the trail poorly maintained, since it is maintained to the expected standards. But I got used to my nice asphalt trails, and the bumpy, jittery trail was a lot for me to handle.

That said, the trail itself was gorgeous. There's a small section that runs along the highway, but the rest is in the woods. Although it follows a stream down to a lake, the entire thing is surprisingly flat. It's just barely downhill on the way to the lake and just barely uphill on the way home. There were some hills around the lake, but only one of them really caused me problems. I had to get off my bike and walk it up the hill. Then I opted to walk it back down the other side instead of attempt the steep and narrow trail down.

I'm glad I did this ride. I just won't be doing it again any time soon. Though I could cut out the part that really gave me trouble. And now that I know what to expect in terms of bumpy trails it might be better in the future. Even the shoddy asphalt was easier to ride over on the way home than on the way out. Maybe once I get more advanced I can become more familiar with the trail. Knowing what to expect makes it easier. But in the meantime I'll be sticking to my well-maintained asphalt trails. There's certainly no shortage of them.

Pros and Cons of Biking to Work

I should perhaps open by saying that I love biking to work. I'm so glad I'm finally fit enough to do this. It is, by and large, a wonderful experience that is improving my life. But, as with everything, there are annoyances. And it's my blog, so I can vent if I want to.

1) My commute is into the sun. East in the morning, west in the evening. It's less of a problem in the evening, because the sun isn't as low when I'm headed home. In the morning, the sun is at exactly the right angle to cause some serious distress. Even wearing sunglasses, I'm often blinded at least once. The flickering caused by tree shadows is distracting. Each morning I've had to come to a complete stop at least once because I couldn't see where I was supposed to go. I was thinking this would get better as sunrise gets earlier, but we're fast approaching the longest day of the year. As soon as this problem goes away it will come back.

2) Capris are the ugliest, least comfortable garment ever designed. But damn they're functional. Yoga pants come with the constant hazard of getting caught in the gears. Shorts ride up and my thighs chafe on the seat. So capris make the most sense. I don't have to like it though.

3) The beginning of the ride home is always awful. My legs are tight from the morning ride. I've had to put my sweaty gear back on, because it makes no sense to pack fresh gear when I'm just going to sweat through it again then immediately take a shower. I always loosen up and adjust eventually. It's happening more quickly each time. But that first half mile is rough.

4) I'm completely dependent on the weather. Sure, I could bike in the rain. That sounds awful and uncomfortable though. Besides which I'd probably need to buy all sorts of additional gear to protect myself and my bike. Instead I just take the metro when there's rain in the forecast. I've gotten tripped up a couple of times, mostly when I wanted to bike, decided not to, and then it didn't rain at all. It'd be nice to be freer to set my own schedule around this.

5) This should change soon, but at the moment I'm mad. Far from losing weight, I've actually gained weight since I started biking to work. I now weigh more than I ever have, and I can't figure out why. Maybe it's just a transition period? Building muscle in my legs? Hopefully this will change soon. If I can stick with it and keep from getting discouraged.

Aside from these things, the commute is pretty great. I love how efficient it is. I'm able to get two hours of exercise in, and I get home less than an hour later than when I commute by train. It gives me longer evenings and more energy. I'm more awake in the morning at work and less stressed when I get home.

The trail is fantastic. Aside from being pretty and not too crowded and smelling nice, it's a perfect course. Both directions begin uphill and finish downhill (mostly), though there's a lot more downhill on the way to work. Not quite halfway through there's an enormous hill that's hell to get up but so much fun to fly down. It's its own reward. There are also stop lights at about the 3 and 7 mile marks that make perfect water stops.

Mostly I'm just hoping that the weather doesn't get too hot too fast. Yesterday it was 83 when I was biking home, and I don't think I can handle biking in temperatures much above 90. But maybe that will change as I get better. Or maybe we'll have a summer as mild as last years. I can hope.

Biking

The thing I miss most abut living in Boulder is how easy it was to bike everywhere. Boulder isn't a big city, and it's one of the more bike-friendly places in the country. It was pretty easy for me to get in the habit of running many of my errands on bike, biking to work, and just going out for quick rides on the weekends.

That all changed when I moved to Virginia. For one, the suburbs are a lot more spread out. Instead of being a mile away, my bank was now closer to three miles away. There are a lot more cars, too, and the whole experience is scarier. The heat and humidity, which I wasn't yet used to, didn't help. It wasn't long before I feel out of the habit completely, and my attempts to pick it back up were cut short by how horrifically out of shape I got.

I'm changing that now.

The ten mile ride to work is a lot more than the two mile ride I had back in Boulder. But I'm in much better shape than I was, even then. It adds to my commute, but it's a more efficient way to exercise overall and leaves me with more time free in the evenings. And if it cuts into my reading time, well, reading less was one of my goals for this year.

I'm hoping to be able to ride to work twice a week, weather permitting. As I get stronger, I may even up that. Although I'm currently pretty tired and sore from doing the ride yesterday. It didn't help that I picked a miserable day for my first bike to work. It was cold enough in the morning to make my hands go numb and windy enough in the evening to add twenty minutes to what is usually an hour-long ride. But I did it, and I can do it again, and I will keep improving.

On top of this, I'm trying to bike for smaller errands. I can easily bike three miles to the pet store or bike store when I need something small. Ditto the grocery store, which is only 1.5 miles away. Although I have to be careful how much I buy when I do that. I can only carry so many groceries. But if I make more, smaller trips, well that's just more excuses to ride the bike.

The key here is incorporating the bike into my daily life. To choose it over the car whenever it makes sense. Staying on the bike makes me want to get on the bike more. And biking constantly will make it easier to go on longer rides when I can. One of these days I may actually be able to keep up with Kevin on a thirty or forty (or fifty?) mile ride.

When I first moved here, one of Kevin's goals was to ride the entire W&OD trail, 45 miles from Purcellville to Shirlington. I dropped him off at the high end and picked him up several hours later at the low end. Maybe next year I'll get him to do the same for me. Or maybe we can find someone else to drive and ride it together.

Perfect

Every now and then you get a perfect day.

Sunday was warm and breezy and sunny. Kevin and I went for a 12.5 mile bike ride, so he could show me how to get to my office from home. It's the longest ride I've ever done, and it felt good. I may have even been able to make it all the way home, but I'm glad we decided to take the metro back. I still want to work up to that round trip slowly, especially since the way home is almost entirely uphill. Though I don't think it'll be as steep or even as continuous as I initially thought. There were some uphill portions on the ride to my office that should even things out. I'm not too far from being able to do the round trip. Or, more importantly, from being able to bike to work.

After we got home, we cleaned up the main floor and I spent a few hours organizing my library. I pulled a few more books to donate, and an entire box-full of Kevin's childhood books that are falling apart. We're going to see how badly his mom wants to keep them, and then have her take those back and throw out the rest. I just don't like having an entire shelf of spineless, musty books that can't even be read. I'd rather buy new copies when it's time. I also moved a bunch of books to shelves in the living room which means that, for the first time in years, there's empty space in my library. It has room to grow again. Though I'm going to try to be more careful about keeping it pruned from now on.

Connor and his girlfriend, Allison, came over for dinner. We sat in the backyard and grilled burgers because, as mentioned, the weather was amazing. I feel like we've usually grilled a lot more by this time in the year. But between rainy weekends and Kevin being out of town, we haven't found the time. It was nice to fire the grill back up and enjoy a cookout. Then we played monopoly on the fancy board dad got us for Christmas. I got destroyed and it looked like Allison was going to win when we stopped the game to go watch Game of Thrones.

It was everything a weekend day should be - the perfect blend of productivity and relaxation, or alone time and family time. It's nice to stop and smell the roses every now and then.

Back on the Bike

I (sort of accidentally) took three weeks off from exercising. I never mean to do this, but it happens. When it does, it's always so hard to get back into the routines that were so easy to let slip

It started with the fancy dinner party we threw a few weeks back when Chev was in town. We moved the bike to the laundry room so we'd have space to play True American. Then we never quite moved it back. The week ended up being incredibly busy. We were trying to clean up after the party, and then clean up more in preparation for the cleaning people. Plus we had to do laundry and pack and were leaving straight from work on Friday. So, knowing how little time I had anyway, working out was the first sacrifice I made to fit everything else in.

Then we were on vacation and instead of working out every day, I was eating out and drinking with friends and family. I was sick when I got home, which ended up killing another week's worth of exercise as I tried to pull myself back into normality. During this time I also stopped weighing myself. There's this weird fear that builds when you've been weighing yourself every day, trying to lose weight, and then you just stop for a while like this. I dealt by not dealing and took to avoiding the scale along with the bike.

Last weekend, even though I still wasn't feeling 100%, I went to buy a new bike. I'm determined to spend more time riding outside this year, and this seemed like the right weekend to get started on that. I even went for a ride, though it was short because Kevin got another flat tire less than a mile in. It felt good, though, to be back on the bike.

The next week I screwed up my courage and got on the scale, convinced I would find that I'd regained the three pounds I've managed to lose since the new year. To my surprise I'd managed to lose a pound instead.

It makes sense, once I stopped and thought about it. I hadn't really quit exercising as completely as I thought. I still met with my trainer that week after fancy dinner party. In San Diego we went on a 3 mile hike up a hill and along the beach. In Colorado I skied for two full days. Well, almost full days. And last week, sick as I felt, I still managed to get my butt to the gym and walk on the treadmill for half an hour.

Getting back in the habit of riding the bike hasn't been too bad. I've had to work up to it, because my cough is still lingering and breathing has been harder than it should be. Instead of 45 minutes on the bike each day, I managed to do 20. Then 30.

I'm hoping to get out for a ride this weekend, though that will depend a bit on the weather. Despite the warming weather during the week, we might be backtracking to winter for a day or two. Maybe I'll be okay with a sweatshirt and some ear muffs, though. I'm ready for Spring to get here, definitively, so I can go for nice long bike rides. I think  I may even be able to keep up with Kevin this year. Or at least not slow him down too horribly.

That may have to wait until next month though. In the meantime, I'll keep going with the stationary bike. Slowly but steadily losing some weight and getting in better shape.

The Home Gym

I should have switched over to a home gym years ago. Though it's possible this wouldn't have worked out as well years ago. It's possible (probable even) that I needed to spend the last few years learning about weight-lifting and discipline. Laying out the foundations for good habits.

At any rate, the home gym has been fantastic so far. I went out and bought a yoga mat and a foam roller and some dumb bells. But I'm still mostly focused on the exercise bike, only breaking out the rest of the equipment once or twice a week.

It's just so easy to get on the bike every night while we're watching TV. Instead of sitting on the couch, playing on my phone, I spend that time pedaling. And I no longer miss key scenes because my multitasking was dividing my attention. This is a much more efficient version of multi-tasking that actually allows me to do everything I want to.

The key has been to not drink with dinner. Kevin and I didn't drink at all in January, which made it easier to form this habit. Come home, walk the dog, eat dinner, and get on the bike. Or bike then dinner if I need to do laundry that night. Either way, it's been surprisingly easy to maintain, coming in to February. And skipping the beer or glass of wine in favor of water or tea can only be good for me.

I still have a few months left of my current contract with my physical trainer. I'm planning to end that and my gym membership at the end of March. In the meantime, I'm actually glad I have so much transition time. It should help me really establish this routine.

I think I've finally something that really works for me, on all counts. Fingers crossed that I'll have more progress to report soon.

Exercise Bike

For the last year or so, I've been becoming more interested in the idea of building up a home gym. As I learn more about weight lifting, I feel more confident in my ability to put together a workout on my own. And it would certainly save time and money if I didn't have to actually go to the gym. But there are obstacles, too. For one, a home gym is really expensive. Mostly because of all the different dumbbell weights you need. But mats, foam rollers, and exercise balls don't come cheap either. There's also the fact that I lack motivation at home. Just like getting dressed and going to an office helps me focus on my work, being in a gym surrounded by other people helps me focus on working out.

All that said, we've taken a first, tentative step in this direction with the purchase of a stationary bike. A bike is something Kevin and I will both use a bunch, especially in the winter. We have it set up in front of the TV, so it should theoretically be just as easy to hop on the bike as it is to sprawl on the couch. Though we haven't really put it to the test yet.

Since getting the bike, I've managed to use it every day. The plan is to continue this, even if it's just for twenty minutes. Getting up half an hour early to get on the bike before showering shouldn't be too much of a hardship, especially since I was able to get up early for physical therapy this time last year. And pairing it with a sitcom (New Girl for now) should make the time go faster. I just hope the Thanksgiving house guests don't throw me too far off  my routine, assuming I managed to actually establish one in the next week.

Now the trick is going to be getting into the gym to lift weights. Especially on weekends, it's a lot easier to just hop on the bike at home for an hour. Which is fine if that's what I was planning to do anyway. And I could always do pushups, situps, and squats at home. I just need to get my mind to frame that corner of the basement as a workout space.

And maybe one day (in the next house), I'll be able to acquire enough equipment and motivation to do everything I want to at home. For now I'll just focus on cycling every day that I can.

Running Again

I hate running. But as cardio goes it's basically the least bad of a series of options. The bike hurts my butt and the elliptical makes my toes go numb and the stair climber can only be used for, like, ten minutes max. At least I like the way I feel after I run.

Intervals make this all easier. And as I am determined to become a runner (for some foolish reason) I have developed a new system that makes heavy use of them.

This all started when my trainer added the intervals to my weekly session. I alternate 30 seconds jogging with 30 seconds of walking for somewhere between 15 and 20 minutes before lifting. I decided to extend this on my own time.

The ultimate goal is to run for an entire episode of the Gilmore Girls, during which I think I would travel somewhere between 3 and 4 miles. Walking I cover just over 2.5 miles, and with my intervals I haven't managed to go farther than 2.7 miles. But this is baby-steps. And a long-term goal will help keep me motivated an on-task. The seven seasons of Gilmore Girls should also help.

The problem is that I'm super out of shape (when it comes to running, I'm actually in pretty decent shape generally). My calves do not like all of this running and they complain loudly after just a few intervals. So I made a deal with myself. I can always take a minute off from the intervals if I increase the incline during that rest minute.

This ultimately results in me running with the incline set at 5 or 6. Or, if I really can't run one day, I end up walking up a rather steep hill for ten or twenty minutes instead. Which is certainly better than nothing, and probably nearly as good as running.

I'm hoping to stick to doing this 2-3 times a week moving forward. Once I can do intervals the whole way through, I'll start lengthening the running portion and shortening the walking portion. Like my own custom "couch to 5K", but on a longer timescale. I don't want to injure myself again by pushing too hard too fast, so I'm giving myself room to go slow. And I'm staying on the treadmill. Partly because it's getting cold and wet outside, but also because I'm way less likely to twist my ankle on the flat surface.

Let's see how long I can stick with this. It'd be great to get to a point where I can run a mile again. Or even further, if my ankle cooperates. I should probably start doing some ankle exercises more frequently, too.

Branching Out

I've gotten a good rhythm going when it comes to weight lifting. I know lots of exercises. I understand about focusing on arms or legs or core, and I know how to mix it up. I can do long workouts and short workouts. I can try out new things. Most importantly, I like it. I have fun lifting weights, watching myself get stronger, mastering new exercises.

But cardio has fallen by the wayside. Lifting all the time leaves me sore all the time, which I definitely don't like. Besides which, cardio is good for you and variety is the spice of life. So I'm trying to reincorporate some other things into my routine.

Last Friday, I decided to give running another go. I haven't attempted to run at all since I hurt my knee over a year ago. But the bike hurts my butt and the elliptical makes my toes go numb and jacking up the incline on the treadmill is only going to get me so far. So I put on an episode of Gilmore Girls and gave myself permission to just do intervals for as long as I could before resorting to walking for the rest of the episode.

All in all it wasn't so bad. I managed to travel about 2.7 miles in 43 minutes. Not spectacular, but better than if I'm just walking. On Monday I tried again, but it was way harder. I could only do 4 intervals (minute jogging, minute walking) before my calves started screaming at me. Whether that's because I haven't run in so long or because I did a bunch of calf raises on Saturday is difficult to say. I bumped up the incline and walked instead, to give my calves a bit of a break.

I also decided that while I was trying (or retrying) new (okay, technically old) things, I would give yoga another go. There was a class at my gym on Sunday morning that I could make it to, so I went.

It was awful. The class was way above my level (and all the beginning classes are at 6 in the morning which is why I didn't go to them). The first ten minutes or so was fine, because it was just breathing and stretching. Then we spent ten minutes on our hands and knees, and that's not something I can do, apparently. My knees were hurting so bad from the pressure that I was near tears. Then, because I wasn't paying proper attention, I did something that caused my old back injury to flare up. I left, walked stiffly to my car, drove painfully home, and spent the next two and a half hours laying very still on my couch.

So. No more yoga.

I think that's okay though. If I can make the running work (and I will get better. Slowly but surely.) and intersperse my lifting with that, well that will be fine.

Feeling Strong

I'm gaining weight again. Which is maybe something I'm just going to have to learn to live with. This time around I'm fairly sure it's muscle, though. So there's that at least. Really I should just stop getting on the scale at all. Except that I really thought I was doing well, and that I'd finally see that damn number go down instead of up.

Aside from that number (which I really ought to just ignore) things are going well. I'm definitely getting stronger across the board. I can do 60-70 pounds on the lat pull down and row. I'm up to 15 pounds on the Arnold Press and 30 pounds on the dead lift. I've added weight to my step ups and feel completely stable doing them now. My trainer noted that, while I still have balance issues on the single-leg dead lift, my knee doesn't wobble at all. When she pushed me to fatigue on various exercises, I was able to do 20 pushups, and then another 15.

All in all I feel stable and strong when I'm lifting now. It's hard to figure out how this relates back to the ways my body is changing. My stomach feels and looks larger, but it's always been the last part of me to show change. The shorts I bought at the beginning of the summer feel loose. So I think I'm heading in the direction I want to be heading.

If I can just remember to stay off the scale, everything should be great moving forward. Despite the weight gain, I'm pretty sure I'm healthier than I've ever been. I'm certainly more active than I've been since high school. And I'm eating way more veggies and less junk than I was back then. I am getting results, as slow as the process has been, and it's making me feel good about myself.

Progress Report

Who could have guessed that the week I committed to getting better at step-ups, my trainer would go and modify them on me. On Wednesday, she had me doing shoulder presses during the step-ups. It turns out the added weight/movement forced me to slow down and focus, which in turn basically eliminated the wobbling. And I really like being able to exercise multiple muscles at once. It makes me feel more efficient.

I also added dead lifts to my personal routine, which made my hamstrings scream in protest the first time but became much more reasonable the second time. The only problem is that the body bars the gym provides are all old enough that the weights have been rubbed off. I'm going to have to switch to dumbbells so I know how much I'm lifting.

As for the push-ups, I was able to do one set of ten followed by a set of eight over the weekend. I could probably do more if I started fresh, but I thrown them in a cycle with a bunch of arm exercises, which leads to faster fatigue. It's still nice to see improvement, though.

I have made very little progress on pull ups. These are hard enough that I basically have to do them first thing, or I won't be able to do them at all. So if someone's on the machine, I end up skipping them and doing other things to work out my back and arms. I'll keep plugging away at them, though.

And I still probably want to buy a bike. Though that's a little lower priority than a new oven, a new mattress, and possibly even a new fridge. Damn, expensive home ownership.

Goals

I haven't posted about the gym in a while. Not because I haven't been going (I have), but because I'm still trying to figure out a routine that really works for me. For most of the winter, I was doing I good job of getting in four times a week - trainer on Wednesday, lifting by myself on Saturday, and cardio on M/Th or T/F. But ever since the wedding I've had a hard time sticking to that. A big part of it is that my routine just got so thrown off. Then weekends were so busy that it seemed nearly impossible to get in on Saturdays. But I'm trying to get back on that schedule.

In that vein, I decided it would probably be helpful to define some goals. The main goal, obviously, is weight loss. But I've been trying that for a year, and I have yet to lose any weight (well, except for the two pounds I gained on the honeymoon, does that count?). So I'm going to try and focus on fitness goals. Places where I should be able to see actual improvement in the coming weeks.

So from short-term to long-term, here we go:

Step Ups. I have a love/hate relationship with step ups. The thing I love about them is that it's really easy to pretend I'm Buffy while I'm doing them. Which makes it easy to get into a rhythm and keep my motivation up. But my balance isn't great. I usually start wobbling about 7 in. So goal number 1: make it through a full set (10 on each side) without wobbling. Then up that to 15.

Modified (Inverted?) Push Ups. I started doing these modified push ups that are just hell on my abs, in a good way. Instead of putting your hands on the floor, you grip some dumbbells or use a stair or something. It requires more balance, which engages your core muscles, which results in your entire torso being sore the next day. They're fantastic. Also I can actually go down farther when I do these, since my boobs and stomach don't hit the ground. Currently I can do three sets of 5. I'd like to be able to do 3 sets of 10. Or even 20 all at once.

Legs. I need to stop focusing so much on my quads and start focusing on my hamstrings. That's poorly defined, as far as goals go. I have a couple of exercises to do, but I hate them. Maybe it's just a matter of doing them until I hate them less? Or maybe I should look into other, hamstring-specific exercises. The real goal here is to build up muscle to protect my knees in the future. Currently it's all unbalanced, which is why I hurt myself so easily last Fall. I don't know, I'll figure this out.

Pull Ups. As it currently stands, I do pulls ups on the assist machine. You stand on a weighted lever thing and it helps make pull ups easier by reducing your own body weight. I have no idea how much it reduces it by or even how to figure that out. The scale goes from 1 to 16, and I currently set it on either 9 or 10. I can do two sets of 10 at that level. My goal here is to do one unassisted pull up. I have an impressively long way to go, given that the last time I tried it was like my arms simply weren't responding to my brain, which was a very strange feeling.

Biking. Okay, this is a really fuzzy goal. And it would require me to invest in a bike and then carve out time to actually ride it regularly. As of last year (ish?) I could ride about 4 miles comfortably and push myself to 10 before I actually felt like dying. So long as there weren't any major hills. So this goal (which I'm still waffling on) would come in two parts. (a) Bike to work. My office is about 10 miles from home, on bike trails. It's all downhill there and all uphill home. But if I could do this once, if I could get to a point where I'm doing it once a week, if I could get comfortable with that sort of distance, that would be a good thing. (b) Maybe sign up for Bike MS next year? There's a 30 mile component. It's at National Harbor in June. It would be for an excellent cause. I don't know. We'll see where I am when that rolls around.

Weight. Okay, weight loss is still a goal. But in a more abstract sense. I'd like to look the way I did in this picture:

We represented Westeros at the 2012 Winter Beerlympics

That was taken about 2 1/2 years (and 25 lbs) ago. I don't think I need to lose a full 25 pounds to get back to that size (~8), since I'm building muscle and that weighs more than fat. At any rate it seems like a perfectly reasonable and doable goal. If I could just lost that first pound.

Anyway, this is where I am. I'm hoping to knock out the first 2-3 by Labor Day, then up the ante on them. Or come up with new short-term goals. I'll keep you posted on my progress.