Comfort Food

Kevin is away on a business trip that's going to last nearly six weeks. It sounds like a long time. It is a long time. But I'm honestly looking forward to having the house to myself for a while. I'm going to miss him, obviously, but it will also be nice to have my own space. I'm hoping to be able to establish some routines around exercise and writing that will be firmly in place by the time he returns. Not that I can't establish those routines when he's around, but it's harder.

It's hard to diet or cut out alcohol when you share meals. It's hard to treat the basement as a gym when he's using it to play video games. Not that there has been even the smallest bit of friction when I have asserted those desires. This is more about me, me being aware that the space is shared, me being unable to get past certain mind blocks and just do it. When it's just me, there's less pressure to perform (and it's all internal pressure, to be clear) so I can really prioritize some of these wants and desires.

Hopefully those routines will carry over once Kevin gets back. Like I said, he's going to have no problem with me taking over the basement for half an hour a day to work out, or eating smaller portions, or turning down the beer/wine. It's just a matter of asserting that. Which means it's a matter of me getting completely comfortable with it.

But I digress.

Knowing that Kevin would be leaving on an extended trip, we spent the last weekend getting in some quality time. I was a little surprised to realize how much of this centered on food. Not that I should have been. Food is so central to so many things, in ways you don't even entirely realize. So we ended up eating a bunch of delicious meals in anticipation of our separation.

Since Kevin will be missing Thanksgiving this year, we decided to do a smaller version with just the two of us. On Friday we roasted a mini-turkey (also known as a chicken) and ate it with some rice pilaf and glazed carrots and a very strange Western Kevin had been wanting to watch. On Saturday I made a casserole that I discovered last year that basically tastes like an entire Thanksgiving dinner in a single dish. It's one of my favorite meals, but it's way too much food for just one person, so I had to sneak it in before Kevin left. Sunday morning was bacon. We'd bought two pounds of bacon for Hallowiener that we forgot about, so Kevin cooked all of it and we've been eating it ever since. Then it was time for football, beer, and pizza.

It was something of a last hurrah for me, too, as I'm hoping to use this time to go on a diet. Sort of. I'm not really planning to change what I eat. I like food too much to ever successfully change my eating habits in the long term. No, my goal is to eat less. Portion control has been a struggle for me ever since I moved in with Kevin. He eats a lot, and it's hard not to match him. So that's a habit I'm hoping to establish while he's gone.

There are some other goals I've set for myself in the last two months of the year. Old-year resolutions, I guess? But more on those in the coming days. Expect some changes, though! And keep your fingers crossed that I'll be able to stick with all of them.